Tech Support Idiocracies #5: Dyslexic Usres

We have a remote user that works out of his home that has trouble getting into the companies Webmail system, which is available on any internet connected PC.  There really isn’t anything strange about this but what makes this situation unique is that since the guy is located in another city it makes support challenging and on top of that he makes a strong case for a potential Dyslexic patient.   9am I get a call from the guy and .. well, consider this scenario, <Read the User: parts with the most-excellent and hard-to-decipher Canadian Newfie accent>:

Tech Support Idiocracies #4: The FIBC Strikes Again!

What do you get when you combine 1 part fail, 3 parts incompetence and a farm animal?  You get the FIBC of course!  The Fail Incompetent Blonde Cow is a rare species and one that deserves special attention.  In today’s blog I’m going to pay homage to the FIBC seeing as she’s the winner of this months epicly failed contest.

Rant: Use The Tools – Check Your Voicemail

I can’t count the number of times I’ve left an internal voicemail with a fellow co-worker only to have them call me back and enquire why I was calling.

I get this a lot:

User: “I saw you called”,

Me: “Yea I did, did you check the voicemail that I left? I kind of explain why I called you.”

User: “Oh, no I didn’t”.

Me: “So you completely missed the big blindingly red light on your phone that indicates you have a voicemail?”

User: “Yea I don’t really use it, whats up?”

Me: *Bangs head against wall*

It’s aggravating to have to explain yourself over and over again to the technopeasants that refuse to use technology that has been put there to help them.  “Oh is checking voicemail too difficult a task for you?  You shouldn’t be here then, here’s your badge, go stand in the corner.”

You’re kind of expecting the user to call back with a response to your question but instead you have to waste more time by explaining what it is you called about in the first place. Lately it’s hit or miss, sometimes they do check, other times they don’t.

It’s Official, Users ARE Clueless! Unleash the Hounds!

There’s a little fact of life which I’ve only just learned now and that is ‘users are completely clueless and pretty much beyond any hope of redemption and there’s nothing I can do about it’.  I’m just learning to accept it now.  It’s taken this long to learn because I’ve always had a glimmer of hope that maybe thing’s would be different down the road with constant teaching, constant hand holding, constant patience but it was all for naught.

The Secret Weapon of the IT Department

Did you know that you have a really good friend that you didn’t know about?  He’s always there, behind the scenes, and he’s a genius because if you ask him any question he knows the answer.  His name is a little weird though but you’ll get used to it and next thing you know you’ll be referring to him by his name like you use the words ‘and’ and well ‘well’.  His name is Google.  Don’t fear him though because Google Is Your Friend. He’s a kind and just fellow, benevolent and good, he may have a little megalomaniac chip on his shoulder but once you get to know him he’s actually kinda cool…

HOWTO: Not Resist Change That Is Actually Good For You

It’s been almost a year since Microsoft released Office 2007. It’s great, it really is and I’m not being paid to say it.  Their Operating Systems aside, out of all their products released so far the Office suite has always been one of the best things to come out of Redmond, ever since Office 95.

Office 95 was introduced during the ‘hey days’ of computing when everyone was just beginning to figure out that using a computer was actually easier and more efficient than using type-writers and ledger books.  This new understanding was, of course, kick-started and coincided with the release of Windows 95 and their GUI is one of the reasons for it’s success.  Up until then the general computing experience wasn’t as permissive as it is today.

HOWTO: Install Gentoo & Win the 100m Dash

Gentoo is simply the best distro out there so in an attempt to simplify the installation I’m going to summarise the entire thing so that you can install Gentoo the right way the first time and avoid trouble later on. The official Gentoo documentation is obviously the best place to go to get the latest info on the install process but if you’re like me and spend alot of time installing Gentoo on multiple machines and end up reading the documentation over and over again you know how tedious it can get with the amount of explaining they do on every little detail so my install summary should help those out that don’t want to wade through all the sludge just to get a squeaky clean installation. In other words I’m cutting through all the clutter, and I mean ALL of it.

This is the most basic install procedure as it relates to stock standard x86 hardware. It’s just pure coincidence that this worked out to be exactly 50 steps :)

The Human-IT Factor

Working in IT is interesting, adding people to the mix makes it even more interesting.   As humans we have a need and desire to connect and be connected to other people and events.  For some it’s the base from which they jump, it’s what drives them, the need to always be accepted by their peers.

Working in IT I see some interesting human-socio dynamics come into play in the subtlest form.  It’s the typical ‘Keeping up with the Jones’ mentality.  I’m sure there’s a thesis on this topic somewhere, if you know of one drop me an email at copelandjNOSPAM@gmail.com (remove the NOSPAM part) it might make interesting reading….

HOWTO: Use PartImage To Backup Your Linux Box

I am incredibly curious and I am always finding new ways of tinkering around with new things so in my neverending quest to better understand the nature of security, vulnerabilities and hacking I decided to setup a honeypot machine live on the internet 24×7 with a public IP.  The PC has Gentoo linux installed which is running on top of a 2.6.12 general-use kernel.  There is no special security or intrusion detection software installed.  SSH is the only noteworthy service running which is listening on port 22 and it’s configured to allow root logins – usually a big no-no but completely acceptable in this situation.  The hackable IP is 68.144.238.32 if you want to give it a shot.

Planning Skills, Or The Lack Thereof

This is an interesting one.  Our company has contracted with a fairly large and highly reputable solutions provider, I don’t want to mention any names but lets refer to them as ‘X’ needless to say they’re huge and have been around since the dawn of man.  Their main purpose is to provide back-office functions to our company with an emphasis on efficiency.

That’s all good on paper and in theory.  In practice it’s another story entirely.  I wanted to title this story ‘Planning Illiteracy’, because in a way that’s really what we’re experiencing.  But I don’t want to be mean so I won’t call it that.