Tech Support Idiocracies #1

Everyone in Tech Support, at some point or another, has encountered those ridiculous support situations that will forever be emblazoned into their memories and that will serve as eternal reminders of the stupidity of the human race. Here’s one from my book..

So this guy comes up to me at work and says he needs new batteries for the cordless mouse in the boardroom, I say, “Sure I think I have some”, I go into my office and check but I’m all out so not knowing what type of batteries he requires I say, “Are you sure it’s double AA batteries and not AAA that you need?” He insists it’s Double AA, then I interrupt and say “Oh, the receptionist has those” and he quickly quirks in with “I’ve already spoken to her, we need the shorter AA batteries”, and I’m like, “Um, AA batteries are only one size” And he’s like “NO THESE ARE SHORTER”, at this point I can hear his desperation so he urgently says, “FOLLOW ME to the boardroom and I’ll show you!”, and I’m like “Okay but you ONLY get one size of double AA, they don’t make shorter or longer ones”.

So I follow him upstairs and as we’re walking he says, “You know I’m not as dumb as I look, you may think I’m stupid but I’m not, I may work at Tesco but I’m pretty bright”. So we walk into the boardroom, up to the cordless mouse, he pops the lid open with much eagerness and says “LOOK see the double AA’s are shorter!!”. So I grab it and pull one battery out, and it’s fullsize, the Logitech Cordless mouse hides the bottom part of the batteries because of space limitations (Click the picture above for actual cordless mouse in this story). The guys face just said it all, he never said a word, walked out and I laughed my frikkin ass off.

Sometimes I am awestruck and wonder how these people manage to eat breakfast and tie their shoelaces in the morning.